Letting go

It is not easy darling,

Pretending for you.

Not loving you because you tell me not to,

Not caring when I do.

It's hard

Having face after pretty face,

Try to erase yours.

Bottle-fulls of this fire,

Try to burnout despair

Works fine

Right until the moment,

I forget myself,

And call you.To hear

The concern in your voice,

The complaints

But no love.

It is not easy

Doing this,

Keeping my promises

I love you.

To a Friend

Dead.

All this time

Little insignificant peart of the universe.

Just another flower in the field.

No great mind, no great deeds.

Just a friendly heart and a smile.

No green turf

To lie lightly over you.

Did they bury you?

Did they burn,

That frail body?

I do not remember.

All I remember is that smile.

And that last goobye

In the evening.

And a funeral next morning.

And you.

Lying there,

Skin sickly grey

And bloodless lips

without the smile.

And stories fluttered around.

I waited.

Until the very last nail.

Then I had to believe,

A the little insignificant part of the universe

And a smile had died.

Life goes on now.

This is in remembrance of a friend I lost when we were 13. I still think of her. Not frequently. Yet it's still strange to think that I live and she doesn't. She was one of those Rare few who did deserve a life... 

In defense of Night Owls

I'm nocturnal. Even before the significant people in my life started living in different time zones and I had the misfortune to be living deep in the east, I have been nocturnal. The omniscient google tells me there must be something wrong with my circadian rhythms (Lets face it, looking up something on the internet is far less time-consuming. Though one does miss holding an actual book in hand) or rather that my night owl-ism must be due to a busy social life/ career/ disease.

:O This I find very offensive!! *looks outraged* Why can't a person be happily nocturnal without being called a sick/ social or worse :O a night-watchman?? (I'm selectively blind to the part of the article that says chronotypes would explain nocturnal behaviour in humans.. where's the fun without a bit of argument)

For the people who worship the good book of science and cold reason (nerds :P ) I have several very good arguments as to why nocturnality is beneficial.

Facts:-
1) Humans are animals.
2)The most powerful and basic of all animal instincts is survival.
3) Adaption lend animals a better chance of survival in their environment.
   Survival adaption-
          i) Resource competition- Being nocturnal is a form of niche differentiation. Species' niches are partitioned by the amount of time as opposed to amount of resources. (Kids use the park during day. Nocturnals, robbers,muggers and vampires use the same park at night)
         ii)Predation- What better time to hunt or be hunted or avoid being hunted than the night. This goes for all forms of hunting. (Imagine the possibilities)
         iii)Water conservation- Especially in arid biomes (or tropics) nocturnal behaviour help creatures prevent losing water. (so you don't have to carry a water bottle and a roll of toilet paper to dab your face with because facial tissue isn't enough)
 4)Therefore, nocturnality helps your survival. Maybe a new species will evolve from the present day nocturnals.

And as for the romantics. You only have to look around :P. What other time of day stars with a single white star in the violet skies and darkens in to a black blanket over the world dusty with white and golden stars? When can we see the waning moon in her full glory? What is the time when warm scented breezes can blow through your hair and calm your mind? We can all do without too much sun burning behind our eyes, the sweat, The noise, the people and the rush of life all around us. Night is not for sleep. Night is for love and poetry and philosophy. Night is for living and and sitting quietly by a window sill contemplating all the sleeping life around us. Nights are for coffee and chocolate and long talks. Or if you like for singing dancing and enjoying. Nights are for books and imagination. Night is the good time to live. Night is the right time to live. But for night to arrive, the day has to be over and the day creatures have to fall asleep. so let us bear day and its creatures as necessary evil while waiting for the night to reach over and put the day to sleep.
a song for night time
Good night <3

Dimensions

I came here to write an article upon seeing facebook photos of an orange faced young blonde woman who was evidently anorexic and the positive comments I saw. But that issue has been addressed so many times it's not interesting anymore. Besides I am not a feminist. I decided while the blondes of the world pursued their dream of becoming two dimensional I would write of something far more interesting. Dimensions.


It all began one dark night. I was in my bed alone in my room with the lights switched off and looking at the distant city lights.... :D I just had the urge to be overly dramatic. Recently one of my friends did mention imprisoning all mean people in a hypercube. which is how my new interest started.


As we all know there are three dimensions. I'm not a math scholar so I will speak in lay terms. Length, width and height. Then there's the relatively new dimension, time. 


Wikipedia defines a dimension as "The dimension of a space or object is informally defined as the minimum number of coordinates needed to specify each point within it."
In our everyday lives we use the three dimensions of Euclidean space. While the Minkowski space is a model created to explain Einstein's theory of special relativity. In Giving the coordinates of  an object Minkowski space uses the axis t to specify it's exact position in time. Which lead me to the question, where is 0,0,0,0 or rather where was it? As yet, we haven't found the answers to that question though there have been many theories and fairy tales about it. 


Something that we all can grasp from it is that while we perceive the three main dimensions we cannot perceive time with our five senses. We can call ourselves three dimensional creatures since our bodies have three dimensions and our external senses can only grasp the concept of the three popular dimensions. How then would the world look like to a two dimensional creature? Nothing of this world would make sense to it. Imagine it seeing a cone base first. We would see an object with a flat circular base tapering smoothly into a point. But our two dimensional creature would perceive a series of flat circles gradually getting smaller and ultimately disappearing to a point. It cannot perceive the nature of a cone. Everyday tasks for us like descending or ascending a staircase would present a mystery to it as great as black holes to us. And above all it cannot perceive us.


Imagine the same small two dimensional creature being placed in a large glass jar. Without grasping the concept of height it has only a small chance of escaping it. If it somehow does escape from the "trap" without understanding the concept of  depth, it would consider it a miracle of whatever two dimensional god it worships. But WE of the three dimensions have no trouble at all of understanding a two dimensional world. So we can safely arrive to the conclusion that only a creature of higher dimensions can understand lower dimensions. Thus my friend's idea of trapping mean and stupid people in a hypercube. They will not be able to escape!!!


 Then we come to the question 'what if there are more dimensions?'. What if there are five, eleven or infinite number of dimensions? What exactly are black holes? Do the forces of the higher dimensions affect the objects in lower dimensions? What if atoms are more than one dimensional? The Large Hadron Collider is trying to find some answers. Tell ya when i read more on it. :)

Paying

Bella Swan got the vegetarian.

I get,

The dark shadow looming,

Death at it's fingertips,

Reaching out over the skies.

A simple little cut

Somewhere close to the heart.

Through it the blood draining

Yet on cold winter nights,

The warmth of it, Sustaining,

All my thoughts.

 Going free hurts worse.

Like salt.

Clinging on is the choice

For life.

While letting it be drained

Out of me.

Choosing the slow death over the swift.

"Bear the pain with a smile.

You didn't let go,

When I did"

Because I couldn't.

"Make mistakes.
But be willing

To pay the price"

Pay it with my life

Is what I do.

It's my mistake.

That invitation.

Over the threshold,

And Into my life.
Bella Swan got the vegetarian.

I didn't.

Fly In The Ointment

Hatred lies thick in the air.
Like honey.
Too thick, to breathe.
Too sweet,
It intoxicates.
Even giving up seems too tiring.
Smiles plastered in place,
While drowning.
So slow.
And tears freeze in the cold.